Fortunately, I'm not the person who will ensure that the Chrysler's supercharged SRT-6 version of the Crossfire will make it safely on to the next straight.
Instead, I'm nervously providing ballast in an SRT-6 piloted by an experienced Chrysler driver hired to hammer home the point that this is a car truly capable of achieving the speeds claimed in the lads' mags.
By the time the centre of gravity is roughly directed through just two tyres, the Crossfire's speedometer is still hovering at around 130mph.
And if that's not a clear enough indication of the speed we are travelling, then the centrifugal forces dragging the flesh of my chin down towards my knees is all the evidence I need.
Sideways
A quick gasp later and we're emerging unscathed from the exit of the 33-degree sideways gradient and heading back up the speedo towards that magic 160mph mark.
And with just a few seconds to get over the bone-rattling experience provided by the Crossfire's firm suspension and low-profile tyres, we're heading back into yet another curve.
The venue for today's excitement is the number one circuit at the Motor Industry Research Assocation's Midlands' proving ground.
But there's also an opportunity for yours truly to put the SRT-6 through its paces on the open road.
I choose to stick firmly to the speed limit, but even so a quick kick of the car's accelerator swiftly exposes the fact that it has 330bhp to play with.
The Crossfire is effectively Chrysler's take on the new Mercedes SLK. The SRT badge - it means Street and Racing Technologies - means that it gets an off-the-shelf AMG 3.2litre supercharged engine.
There's also a modest sprinkling of additional bling, namely a rear spoiler, new alloys and a badge bearing the all important fact that this is the SRT-6 version of the Crossfire.
I certainly think it looks good. And I can certainly vouch for the fact that it can keep its fire-breathing promises.
ALL it takes is one minute and 30 seconds for me to forget everything my expert guide has said about the quad cab Dodge Ram SRT-10. "This is a truck powered by the same 8.3litre, V10 petrol engine as the Dodge Viper," he tells me. "It's built to carry very heavy loads using cart springs - and yet there's absolutely no weight in the back.
"Oh, and there's absolutely none of the modern electronic safety equipment you've come to expect either! That means no ABS and no ESP, so watch yourself." With Stupid duly installed at the wheel, we trundle carefully down a dual carriageway, indicate right, then floor the left-hand drive behemoth's accelerator.
Talk about a memory jogger - planting 500bhp of power on to wet tarmac serves instantly to bring Mr Expert's words hammering back into my head like a dentist's drill.
The rear end kicks out uncontrollably like a demented donkey and I somehow manage to avoid knocking down a listed cottage sitting at the side of the road.
But the REALLY worrying thing is that if you think I'm daft, consider the mono-celled brain possessors who are likely to be enchanted by the Dodge.
Shiny
You can almost hear Premiership footballers as they say: "Wow, it's big, it's shiny, it drives like a 10-ton truck and flies like a fighter jet - I gotta get me one of those."
But whether you'd ever feel confident enough to drive the Dodge or not - my knees are still shaking like a jelly - it's safe to say that it's an impressive piece of kit.
It has all the trimmings of a luxury sports saloon with enough space to store a few bales of hay in the back.
It comes with heated leather seats, 22in alloy wheels and enough torque to toss a caber the size of the Beetham Tower.
What's more, as in the case of the Crossfire, I can also vouch for the Dodge's headline-grabbing speed claims.
Put through its paces on the same MIRA test track, the Ram acquits itself with ease.
With an aircraft-like roar of the V10 and a long straight up ahead, the Ram powers to 130mp, cornering at a similarly spectacular 110mph.
And you'll be absolutely delighted to hear that Mr Expert - and not Stupid - was at the wheel.
